ÃÑ 44ÆäÀÌÁö

42ÆäÀÌÁö º»¹®½ÃÀÛ

Eye of The Argus
Essays in Love
ByJeonNu-ri
EditorialConsultant
astmonth,IwenttotheweddingofsomeoneIhadbeenclosetoatworkwhenIwasanintern.The
weddingwasheartilybeautifulandthecoupleseemedsoblissfulasifthismarriagemeanttheworld
to them. On the way home, so many thoughts whirled around in my mind. All the thinking boiled
downtoonequestion?howdopeopledecidetomarrysomeone?Someonemightsaythatmarriageiswhat
happensnaturallywhenadecentpersonappearsinfrontofyouattherighttime.However,Imean,deciding
whoIwillspendtherestofmylifewith,isitnotasuperdifficultandweightyprocess?HowcanIeverbe
surethateverydayofmylife,evenifnotfullofextremehappiness,Iwillnotbeunhappywiththisperson?
Every time I see couples passing by on the street, I wonder, ¡°Do they really love each other?¡± It is not
because I am skeptical about love and relationships, but just out of curiosity ? how do various people each
definelove?Icannotofferanyin-depthinsightsaboutloveacademically,butIjustwanttosharewhatIhave
feltaboutlovesofar.
Loveisgivingandreceivingtrust.Ivaluefaithinrelationshipsmorethananything.Therewasanincident
whenIwasafreshmanthatprofoundlycontributedtomycurrentsetofvalues.Ithoughteveryonetellsthe
truthtotheirlovedonesandactsgenuinelyasamatterofcourse.ItturnedoutthatIwasjustnaive.Irealized
that faith does not naturally build up itself ? both giving and earning trust take efforts. In fact, it is very
difficultforpeoplewhohavebeenbetrayedorostracizedbyfamilymembersorfriendsorloversinthepast
tobelievesomeone.However,evenapersonwiththedeepestwoundscanrecoverandsincerelytrustanother
whenheorsheeventuallymeetssomeonewhoisfilledwithtruelove.Thereisnoremedyforabrokenheart
buttolovemore.
Love is accepting each other's differences as they are. It sounds simple, but it is difficult to practice. I
thought that I do not judge the way someone behaves or try to change them to my standards, but I was
no different. When my beloved one spoke and acted differently than I expected, I felt uncomfortable and
thought,Whyishelikethis?IfIwerehim,Iwould¡¦IguessIalwayswantedtogetridofeverydifference
betweenusbyforcinghim,notmyself,tochangesothatnothingcouldmakeusfight,¡°tonipitinthebud¡±
before any conflicts arise. This idea was fairly immature ? now I understand that being different is what
makesarelationshipevenmoreamusing.Peoplecanlearnfromeachotheratanymoment.Everyoneneeds
toworkhardtoembracetheotherpersonastheyare.Ichoosetobewithsomeonewhomakesmethrowoff
mymaskbecauseheassuresmethatitistotallysafetorevealmyselffullyandthatheisreadytoaccepteven
myworstself.
Finding out what love is and how to love is a lifelong study, but one thing is sure ? it is a real cliche, but
lovingyourselfisthemostimportantofall.Ifyoucannotordonotloveyourself,youaredefinitelyunable
toloveothers.Ifyoustarttolovejustbecauseyouareneedyandlonely,thatlovebecomesapoisonandyou
willendupbeingevenmoremiserable.Ihopethateveryonecanhavearelationshipwheretheycandiscover
their new selves rather than losing themselves. I hope all HUFSans have a warm year-end surrounded by
peopletheylove.
wjssnfl10@hufs.ac.kr
40
www.theargus.org

42ÆäÀÌÁö º»¹®³¡



ÇöÀç Æ÷Ä¿½ºÀÇ ¾Æ·¡³»¿ëµéÀº µ¿ÀÏÇÑ ÄÁÅÙÃ÷¸¦ °¡Áö°í ÆäÀÌÁö³Ñ±è È¿°ú¹× ½Ã°¢Àû È¿°ú¸¦ Á¦°øÇÏ´Â ÆäÀÌÁöÀ̹ǷΠ½ºÅ©¸°¸®´õ »ç¿ëÀÚ´Â ¿©±â±îÁö¸¸ ³¶µ¶ÇϽðí À§ÀÇ ÆäÀÌÁöÀ̵¿ ¸µÅ©¸¦ »ç¿ëÇÏ¿© ´ÙÀ½ÆäÀÌÁö·Î À̵¿ÇϽñ⠹ٶø´Ï´Ù.
»ó´Ü¸Þ´º ¹Ù·Î°¡±â ´ÜÃàÅ°¾È³» : ÀÌÀüÆäÀÌÁö´Â ÁÂÃø¹æÇâÅ°, ´ÙÀ½ÆäÀÌÁö´Â ¿ìÃø¹æÇâÅ°, ùÆäÀÌÁö´Â »ó´Ü¹æÇâÅ°, ¸¶Áö¸·ÆäÀÌÁö´Â ÇϴܹæÇâÅ°, ÁÂÃøÈ®´ëÃà¼Ò´Â insertÅ°, ¿ìÃøÈ®´ëÃà¼Ò´Â deleteÅ°