총 36페이지

31
FromInternationalEyes
My only option was the Irish Pub
world. Eventually I met many of those
The click of my cowboy boots against
where the expatriates gathered most
people, visited them, attended their
wet pavement was the only sound I was
nights to drink, play poker, and shoot
weddings, and even dated a few of the
awareofbetweenmyapartmentbuilding
pool. I’m the daughter of an alcoholic, I
men.Butthatcamelater.
and the pub. Then the pub was right in
didn’tlikethatoption,andIdidn’twant
It was my first year in Korea and my
front of me?a nondescript building on a
to be in such an atmosphere. Some of
first Christmas away from home. I was
nondescriptstreet.Iwasdelightedtosee
my most vivid memories of childhood
alone.Ihadnofriends-noonetohug,no
nodrunkenrevelrygoingonoutside.
involve the smell of my father’s breath,
one for whom I could cook or go to the
My breath steamed up the window
hiscrueltywhiledrunk,andhisabusive,
movies with. When I hiked, I walked
as I peered inside. What I saw amazed
condescending language when he was
the trails alone. I ate alone and did
me. The room was covered in banners.
sober. Those painful memories kept me
everythingbymyself.
Poinsettias were everywhere and the
fromanyplacethatservedalcohol.
My spirit dragged, and I counted the
pool table was the buffet table. The bar
days until my contract expired and I
held a punch bowl filled with eggnog
couldleave.
nexttoastackofglasses.
And now Christmas was almost
Timidly, I walked inside. From the
here and, for the first time in my life, I
speakers, Gene Autry’s voice sang,
dreaded the holiday season. I tried to
“RudolphtheRed-nosedReindeer.”
make up for the aloneness by talking
Just then a pretty red headed woman
to my online friends, my sisters, and
cameuptome.“Wewonderedwhenyou
my friends back home. Most of them
wouldfinallycomeandhangwithus.”
encouragedmetofindsomethingtodo.
I blinked back tears and squeezed her
“You can’t be alone on Christmas,”
quick. She introduced herself, showed
theysaid.Theymeantwell,buttheyhad
mearound,andintroducedmetoaslew
no idea how isolated I was. They also
of familiar faces. I met an American
couldn’t tell me what to do-only that I
who was taking magic lessons in
neededtodosomething.
exchange for English classes; I spoke to
AfewdaysbeforeChristmas,Iopened
awomanIregularlynoticedatthespa.I
thepaper,clickedonafewwebsites,and
shookhandswiththeteacherwhowaved
scoured the bulletin boards on buses
to me when we frequently passed each
and restaurants. I read of events in far
other.AnothermantheretaughtKorean
away Seoul and holiday gatherings in
to the expats. I chatted with the woman
the nearby city of Busan, but nothing
withwhomIhadriddentoschoolduring
in my little town. At last I found an ad
myfirstdaysinthecity.
for my little town that read: Traditional
AsItalkedandlaughedwiththeothers,
ChristmasDinner.
IrealizedIwasn’ttheonlyonelonelyfor
That excited me until I read a little
home. The barkeep knew about western
further and saw these words: Come to
customs and opened the pub space for
theIrishPub.
anyonewhoneededsomewheretogoon
In desperation and after a full day of
ChristmasDay.
indecision, I decided that my loneliness
Before long we sang Christmas carols
was bigger than my apprehension.
andyuletidetunes.Wesharedouryams
Besides, I had promised family and
and squirted whipped cream smiley
friends that I would do something. I
faces on the pumpkin pies. Someone
As the months in Asia went by, I got
picked up American candies I’d bought
offered to pray. We reached around the
on the Internet more often. I wrote on
in the airport a few months earlier and
table to hold hands. I assumed we all
message boards, joined a chat room,
started out for the pub. I figured I’d sit
remembered our families back home. I
and started a blog. I was desperate for
and eat chocolate-covered macadamia
knowIdidasIlistenedtohimpray.
Englishcontact,andtheInternetbecame
nuts if the evening turned out to be a
“Amen,” we said, and when I looked
my lifeline to the English-speaking
bust.
up,IrealizedIwasn’ttheonlyonewith
DECEMBER 2011

현재 포커스의 아래내용들은 동일한 컨텐츠를 가지고 페이지넘김 효과및 시각적 효과를 제공하는 페이지이므로 스크린리더 사용자는 여기까지만 낭독하시고 위의 페이지이동 링크를 사용하여 다음페이지로 이동하시기 바랍니다.